I know that everyone in the world right now has their own unique situation and there are plenty that are much more challenging than my current situation but let me tell you we have been hit by a storm lately.   As Trump would say, “A storm of EMENSE proportions!”

In 2019, both my wife and I worked full time as physical therapist while coming home to two toddlers who are now 12 and 28 months old.  On top of this I was finding time to train and compete after having hip surgery 1 year ago.  This lifestyle was pretty crazy to begin with but in December it turned upside down.  

On Friday December 13, 2019 I took our little 8 month old to urgent care for what we thought was strep throat but it turned out to be RSV.  He was rushed to Seattle Children’s hospital and was put in the ICU. His status deteriorated to a point that he would need to be on a ventilator to reduce how hard his body was working.  There were issues that occurred during this procedure and he then coded and they had to do CPR for 7 minutes on him.  This was definitely the most emotional and distressed time of my life.  Thankfully they were able to get him stabilized and after 12 days we were able to leave just in time to have him home for Christmas. At this point we were just ready to turn the clock and hit the reset button for 2020.  

The plan for 2020 was that I would switch to part time at work to put more focus on training and preparing for the 2020 Paralympic Games. We thankfully  had family to help take care of our little one as he recovered from the traumatizing event  and keep him out of day care until he was 1 year old to get his lung a little stronger and get out of the cold season.  

In January and February things were going pretty well until our two year old Kennan, who has a history of breath holding spells in which he passes out for scary lengths of time had a few unusual episodes that made us concerned for either cardiac or seizure type behaviors.  This meant more tests being done and more concern on our part.  It also put questions in our heads of, “When will this ever end?”

By mid to late February, we finally thought things were getting to our new normal and then the second wave hit.  The Coronavirus hit the US and of course where did it hit first?  Of course Seattle, where we live.  The number of cases and deaths were building up, the majority of which were at the Life Care Nursing facility.  This was not where I work but I do work as a physical therapist in this setting with this population.  My wife and I became concerned for our little ones, especially Asher Tutwiler (nicknamed Tut) who had the RSV and my parents who were living with us and in their late 60’s.   My wife also works in outpatient physical therapy with on the job injury cases so hands on work is part of a typical day.

Over the next few weeks, every day became a dilemma of whether it was safe to go to work or not.  The social distancing orders set in and one by one everything began to shut down.  .  Press briefings by the President which hadn’t occurred in over a year began to be the daily norm.   Everyone was ordered to stay home but as health care workers we never shut down. We got into this profession to help and care for people but I don’t think any of us could have dreamt what is currently going on.  Sometimes I wake up and it just seems like this could only be a bad dream but the TV quickly reminds me that it is real.  

As the waves of Coronavirus came crashing through it was inevidable that the Tokyo 2020 games could not go on as planned.  The next wave of news hit that the Olympics and Paralympics would be postponed until 2021.  This meant that all of the planning to change to part time would need to be reconsidered and then we would have to figure out how we could juggle the next 3-4 months as we were not going to put our children back into day care with the state of the world and the fact that we had no way of knowing the exposures of not only the kids but also their parents.  Kids seem to be very little affected by this virus but because Tuts lungs had been damaged he would fall into the very small population that would be considered compromised. 

With all of these changes, many moral, ethical and financial dilemmas have arose.  With testing almost non existent for the Coronavirus unless obvious symptoms were present,  how do know if we were exposed?  When do we decide that its not safe to go to work and which of us is less likely to be exposed to a positive patient?  How long can we financially afford to have one of us work?  How do you mentally prepare your mind to focus on the facts and not the fear/panic that is trying to wage war on you at all times? These are some of the questions that were going through my head.  We truly are in a war like situation.

There is very little good that we can take away from what is currently going on but the ONE truth will be revealed.  These situations challenge our strength and our fight.  This pandemic will weed out those that lay down in its path to those that do whatever it takes to continue fighting with every ounce of energy, courage, determination and faith. This storm is a war and we need to not panic but unite together and make each other stronger. We will have to face our fears and remain calm in very stressful situations. We must remember that this situation will not last forever. It will eventually calm down and although our world may be changed forever, we will recover so long as we continue to fight the war.